In which Wolf reflects on how to deal with life's imperfections. Watch this video on YouTube here: https://youtu.be/pHWB6vHEOZw
One of the philosophies I draw a great deal of strength from is Buddhism. I call Buddhism a "philosophy" and not a "religion" because for me, the religious aspects are not what I personally find interesting. But the Buddha's approach to actually living life and dealing with human suffering are truly unique.
Here's another Buddhist parable that illustrates this beautifully.
A once well-to-do farmer had heard that the Buddha was a wonderful teacher and went to see him, seeking resolution to a set of distressing problems.
“I’m a landowner,” he told the Buddha, “And I love to watch my people working in the fields and to see that my crops grow. But last summer we had a drought and nearly starved. This summer, we had too much rain and some of my crops did poorly.” The Buddha listened and nodded compassionately.
“I have a wife too. She’s a good woman and a wonderful wife. But sometimes she nags me. To tell the truth, sometimes I grow tired of her.” Again, the Buddha nodded.
“I have three children. Two are basically good, and I am very proud of them. But sometimes these two refuse to listen to me or pay me the respect I deserve. My oldest son is not so good. He drinks far too much and now he’s wandered off. He’s been gone a year and I don’t know where he is or even if he’s alive.” The man began to cry and the Buddha’s face filled with compassion.
The farmer carried on like this for another hour. When he had exhausted himself, he turned to the Buddha and said, “Please tell me what to do,” fully expecting to receive an answer that would solve all his problems.
“I cannot help you,” replied the Buddha.
“What do you mean?” the farmer retorted.
“Everyone has problems,” the Buddha replied. “In fact, everyone has eighty-three problems. You may solve one now and then, but another is sure to take its place. Everything is subject to change. Life is impermanent. Everything you have built will return to dust; everyone you love is going to die. You, yourself, are going to die someday. Therein dwells the problem of all problems, and there is nothing you can do about it.”
The farmer was chagrined. “What kind of teaching is this? How can it possibly help me?”
“Perhaps it will help you with the eighty-fourth problem,” answered the Buddha.
“What is the eighty-fourth problem?” asked the farmer anxiously.
“The problem of not wanting any problems,” replied the Buddha.
The first of Buddhism's "Four Noble Truths" is often translated, "Life is suffering." Now, if you're going to try to sell a religion, this seems like a pretty bad place to start.
But the Sanskrit word dukkha translated "suffering" really has no direct correlate in English. The closest single word would probably be "unsatisfactoriness." It brings to mind the image of a cart wheel that is so ever slightly off-center. Despite all efforts, it was made that way and it always will be, slightly imperfect; in fact every cart wheel ever made is imperfect, in other words, dukkha.
Pretty much everything in life is in some way dukkha. Your health is dukkha. Your work is dukkha. Your favorite food is dukkha. Your country is dukkha.
Not only is everything dukkha, everything is also, as the Buddha said, impermanent, which in Sanskrit is . Nothing you enjoy will last forever; it is annica, everyone you love is annica, and of course you and I won't last forever: we are annica. Everything changes: good things come, but they also go. Bad things come, but they also go.
This is the state we find ourselves in, the state of all being.
The key that Buddhism provides is that, yes, life is dukkha, but that's normal and expected. But we greatly multiply our actual suffering by demanding life like our lives ought to somehow be this way. This false expectation leads to a deeper and wholly unnecessary form of suffering.
Here's the takeaway: enjoy life's highs, and deal with the problems and losses life brings you. Like the Buddha, show others compassion. Work to make life better for yourself and others. But don't become identified with your problems, because then your inevitable discomforts in life become true suffering.
But what do you think? Let me know in the comments, and you can also join my community by emailing me at wolfpack@bewareofwolf.com. I read every email I receive, and respond to many.
See you tomorrow!